The feeling you get when you realize it's been almost a month since you wrote your last blog post:
I've had this weight hanging over my head for weeks now. WEEKS! In full transparency, I've started and almost completely finished three full blog posts. None of them have actually been posted, however. Why?
Well, mostly because I've felt torn this month. The post I originally started (WEEKS ago) was lighthearted, funny, gif-filled, generally meaningless content. It was fun to write, don't get me wrong. But in the middle of writing this post, I was overwhelmed by news of impeachment inquiries, climate change and generalized chaos. It was difficult for me to write something so fun, so lighthearted, when at times it felt like the world was burning.
So, I started a second post. In this post I poured out my heart about the serious things of the world. And yet again, I froze, worried I couldn't find the right words to say, worried I wasn't the right person to write about politics, worried (to be honest) about offending someone.
When I first started this blog, I didn't want to declare a specific niche for myself. I wanted to write about what I wanted to write about, when I wanted to write about it.
Years ago, when I was first learning how to write, my teacher told us to "write what we know." That always infuriated me. Probably because this teacher didn't explain what she meant very well and I assumed I could only write about things that had physically happened to me. At 7 or 8 years old, not that much has happened to a person. I wanted to write about leprechauns and outer space, two things I certainly didn't "know" very personally.
So, when I started this blog I felt the same way. Every online article assured me I needed to declare a highly-specific and trafficked niche for myself if I ever wanted to be successful. I wasn't that interested in monetizing my blog, or being successful, I just wanted to write. I haven't changed much since I was 7 or 8; I still want to write without restrictions and simply for the love of it.
This month, though, that decision hit me straight in the face. Am I the type of blog that writes about low-stakes, silly topics, or am I the type of blog that writes about things that really matter? I didn't know how to be true to myself this month.
Why am I telling you all of this?
Honestly I didn't plan on it.
No, really. I was going to write about my busy, busy month. I would've shown you pictures from my trip to New York (don't worry, I'll still do that. But, be sure to subscribe to my newsletter for that content), and tell you about the conference I attended for work, and celebrate my upcoming birthday (mark your calendar, November 8). But here I am anyways.
I think I want to be someone who, in an increasingly polarized media landscape, can write about things that matter, and things that don't. I have an upcoming post about The Bachelor, and one about politics -- two things I'm still figuring out how to talk about. Among friends, I'm someone you can come to for the latest info on the Kardashians and the Democratic presidential candidates; Netflix suggestions and suggestions on charities to support. I'm fun and serious and everything in between, and I'm going to write that way too.
Now, as for my fear of offending people... I'm just going to have to bite the bullet on that one.
Kourtney is my favorite Kardashian, I like Pilot Pete, #IStandWithRefugees, also immigrants and women and LGBTQ+ individuals and all marginalized people, also #BlackLivesMatter, and you should all watch The Politician on Netflix this week.
Anyways thanks for reading. I'll be back with either the fun or serious content next week. I guess it'll just depend on how I'm feeling.
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